Dropping My Daily Stool Sample

No Plugs

Dear Malach

• Colonel Colonel asks: Dear Malach,  ok, I was actually listening to Slip Sliding Away on pandora.com when I clicked in here.  Is Rod Serling hiding in the bushes?  Welcome to the Stool Sample zone.
• Tiff asks: Dear Malach, Collectoons, huh? How do you have time for that with all the WiiFit you’ve been doing??  I do about 1 hour a night of WiiFit, and Collectoons is something I do when I am bored.

Malach has something to be mad at Barack about!
What is this you say?  Well, let me tell you.  I did my taxes about a week ago, got them direct deposited the other day, and $1200 was missing from my federal return.  At first I was a bit confused, thinking they paid me extra, but when I went to the IRS site, I found this out.

As part of the stimulus package, if you own back money to a federal organization, the government was garnishing tax returns.  So, my wife owes $1200 on her student loan, well she did owe it.  Yes, I paid it, but it was generally late, and sometime sporadic.  I was planning on cutting it in half with this return, and paying off the remainder of my wifes’ Discover Card (which is about $600).  So, a good chuck of my return was taken, those bastards.  While I thank Uncle Sam for decideding to rid me of the remainder of a 1 year old loan, I would of liked to have some choice in it.  For me, this is not a real big deal, I still got some return, and my bills are now all pretty caught up, especially the student loan.  What I am more think of it people like my clients, who use their return to catch up on their winter bills.  You see in MA, there is a law, the the utility companies cannot shut off your utilities generally between late October and Early May, no matter what you owe, even if you don’t make one payment.  A lot of people I know, decide not to pay the utilities, or pay less than what they want, and make up the difference at tax time.  Yeah, I’ve done it too, very useful around the holidays.

So, I am working with people who are barely scraping by, and probably are relying on that tax return to get their head back above water.

Hey, Dubya never did this to me!  If I had known this would happen, I would of found many more deductions.

Sick
Thanks Moog, your daughter gave my daughter the vomiting plague.  Woke up this mornning around 3AM, had not only vomited all over herself and the bed, had also peed herself.  That is some talent right there.

HEY!
SMELL MY FINGER!

Malach’s Video of the Day

I am Malach, and I have a friend named Zach, and in high school we used to sing this to him, only we replaced Lego Maniac with Necrophiliac. ZACH SMOKES!